Will they or won’t they?
King Charles and Queen Camilla, I mean.
Turn up at Randwick today, for whatever the races there are .
Look, even the possibility of it is just so exciting, TFF can barely raise spit!
Such, I kid you not, has been the tenor of much of the commentary this week about the visit of your Lord and Liege and Sovereign – not mine – to our fair city by the Englishman. I gather Saturday is booked in for a rest day, but, look, you just never know!
Apparently, he might really turn up at Randwick.
King Charles III might just visit the races on Saturday.Credit: AP
And just imagine the joy if you could maybe meet them! Maybe, you could even bow, scrape and curtsy, but why stop there? If you rolled on your back, who knows, they might tickle your tummy for you, with their Royal feet.
Oh, the excitement, the things you could tell your grandkids. “Yes, the points of their toes, went right in my belly-button! I could feel it, right there! I never felt so fulfilled!”
(Friends? Be better than that. The days of “I did but see her passing by, and yet I love her till I die,” are gone. Debasing ourselves in front of visiting English people should have gone with the end of being a colony, and this carry-on is nowt but an atavistic echo of the traditional class system England specialises in, but Australia is rightly proud of having freed ourselves from. Apart from some people.)
Rocky Elsom has vowed to appeal his conviction in France.Credit: Getty
Rocky’s road to appeal
As discussed, TFF talked with Rocky Elsom on Monday evening our time and found him extraordinarily calm – not like someone convicted in absentia in France and facing five years in prison. He was very co-operative and first sent me a statement on the following day before following up on Thursday with more detailed responses to my questions.
I do not pretend to understand the ins and outs of this affair, but am told by legal-beagles with great experience in French law that if he can prove he was not contacted by French authorities over his case, therefore rendering him incapable of mounting a defence – and moving him into Kafka-esque territory – then his grounds of appeal will be strong. If not, however, he faces a future where every knock on the door in any country in the world with an extradition treaty with France really will sound like thunder.
In the meantime, this was his response to three of my questions.
Was there proper governance in running the club? Who oversaw your decisions?
“Yes. The board.”
There are reports of you steadily alienating the Narbonne locals with your decision-making, from letting go of French players to bring in more Australians, to a lack of engagement with local groups who adored the club. One French report in 2019 said: “We have never seen such a secretive president. His confidences to the press were as rare as those of the Queen of England. He seemed to take a malicious pleasure in cutting the club off from the city, its supporters, its elected officials, its partners and all the media.” Is that fair?
“I was very secretive about potential player signings. Almost every player signed with Narbonne did so as a last resort, so I never announced a recruit until their contract was registered with the league, at which time, it became public knowledge. Whenever news broke that a player we wanted was thinking of signing with us, another club would offer them more money and they’d take it.”
What are your plans over the next few days and weeks?
“I need to get the documents from the Narbonne court and lodge an appeal.”
Watch this space. It feels like it is going to run for months.
Cricket’s fairway to heaven
As they are ever wont to do, The Chappell Foundation golf day this week will bring together some heavy hitters. Among them will be former NRL CEO Todd Greenberg and one of his predecessors in the gig, David Gallop.
As the seasons have changed, however, so have their roles. Greenberg is now CEO of the Australian Cricketers Association and the most likely candidate to take over as CEO of Cricket Australia. Gallop is now chair of Venues NSW, which most of us knew as the SCG Trust before the NSW Government cleaned the stables.
Among Gallop’s glittering if peripatetic career – he was also a heavy hitter in the Super League days, and was CEO of Football Federation Australia until 2019 – he was also once a contender for the gig that Greenberg will hopefully be getting.
I know. Stop the sporting merry-go-round, I want to get off, too. But, ideally, somewhere on the fourth fairway, Gallop and Greenberg can talk turkey, if not birdies and eagles, and plot the return of cricket to being less the visual wallpaper of summer, and more an event worthy of going to!
Cowboy Sachin
Let’s cross now, to the Dallas Morning News sideline eye for the Dallas Cowboys, Kristi Scales.
“The Michael Jordan of cricket”: Neither Dak Prescott nor Zeke Elliott nor Micah Parsons nor any of other Cowboys or Lions superstar players were the most well-known athlete in attendance at AT&T Stadium in Texas on Sunday. Not from an international perspective, that is.
Cricket great Sachin Tendulkar.Credit: Getty
Sachin Tendulkar, arguably the greatest batsman in the history of cricket, was a special guest of the Cowboys. The former captain of the Indian national team was on the sideline before the game, soaking in the game-day atmosphere and admiring the stadium. He could not have been more friendly or approachable and was genuinely enjoying the spectacle.”
Alas, what the Little Master saw from the Cowboys was a rolled gold disaster, their worst loss in four decades, having their helmets handed to them 47-9 by the Detroit Lions, which, yes, really is the NFL’s answer to a cricket score.
Interestingly, the DMN reports that Tendulkar was in town for a coaching clinic and promotional opportunities for the Dallas-based National Cricket League.
A group of GWS Giants players are in hot water.Credit: Getty
No adults in Giants’ room
An explanation for the Greater Western Sydney Giants’ disgrace this week, their carry-on during “Wacky Wednesday”, which saw players engaged in skits that turned on rape culture?
It’s like this. You may recall, the FitzSimons Theorem of Touring, which is that: Once a sports team goes through customs, the emotional age of everyone on the tour drops by 10 years, with 22-year-olds carrying on like 12-year-olds, and blokes in their early 30s behaving like they once did at the first 21st birthday party they ever attended.
Well, exactly the same dynamic applies on Mad Mondays, Teenage Tuesdays and Wacky Wednesdays . . . but worse. The wonder of it is this: where was the adult in the room to put a stop to it? Was there not a 40-year-old, who still clocked in at 30, with sufficient wherewithal to step forward and say what needed to be said? Stop.
Apparently not. We know some blokes were uncomfortable with what happened, otherwise we would never know about it. But none with the gravitas to call it off at the time.
What they said
Nick Kyrgios will be back for the Australian Open: “The injury I had was brutal … The surgeon said I probably wouldn’t be able to play again. But I said whatever, just try and get me another two-to-three years of my career. Everything has gone semi-well, and I will be playing the Australia [sic] Open this summer.”
Socceroos coach Tony Popovic after they drew with Japan: “It was wonderful character in the group … This was a huge test, but they hung in there the whole time.”
Nedd Brockmann after he ran 1000 miles: “My toes looked like King Charles’ fingers.”
Long-distance running great Nedd Brockman in some distress.Credit: Marty Rowney / Bursty
Joseph Suaalii on starting his professional rugby journey: “I played the game at school, so it’s just fine-tuning and getting the skills back that I had in rugby. It’s a pretty simple game at the end of the day, so yeah, very excited.”
Patrick Cummins on his captaincy style: “My whole life, you look up to the Australian captain and you know who it is, and you’re like,‘Oh wow, they’re so accomplished, and they must have all their shit together’. And then suddenly when you are captain . . . it was like ‘OK, do I want to try and replicate other people, or do I just want to be myself?’ And I always thought I should be myself because it’s all I really know.” And he’s been brilliant.
Indianapolis Colts quarterback Joe Flacco, who is 39, on his teammates: “I could be these guys’ dads.”
Former Waratahs coach Matt Williams, who also worked with Narbonne, taking direct aim at Rocky Elsom: “I’m delighted justice is going to be done, absolutely delighted. It’s broken the community, broke their hearts. Some of these old guys there that gave their life to the club . . . they saw outsiders come in and rip their club apart.”
Novak Djokovic on Rafa hanging up the racquet: “Also for Roger a few years ago when he announced retirement, and Andy as well this year. It’s a bit overwhelming for me. I don’t know what to make out of it. I still enjoy competing, but part of me left with them, a big part of me.”
Peter V’landys: “I would like to leave a legacy where rugby league is indestructible.” If they don’t get on top of concussion and CTE that won’t happen.
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell on the possibility of playing the Super Bowl overseas: “We’ve always traditionally tried to play a Super Bowl in an NFL city — that was always sort of a reward for the cities that have NFL franchises. But things change. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if that happens one day.”
Travis Kelce, NFL star, Taylor Swift’s partner and host of Are You Smarter Than a Celebrity, on which category stumped him: “There’s an astronomy category. I didn’t know anything about that and I still don’t. On top of that, I didn’t even know that was taught in elementary school.”
Indian cricketer Hardik Pandya on being Player of the Series against Bangladesh after doing some work with God in the nets: “God has been kind to always come up and help me out.”
Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce at the US Open tennis men’s final.Credit: AP
Jonathan Wilson in The Guardian on the Manchester City case and the state of sport in 2024: “How might football end? Through the greed and monstrous self-interest of those who never really cared for that game, and the complacency of those who allowed it to happen. Winter may already be here.”
LA Dodger Kiké Hernández after helping them advance to the next round of the play-offs: “Are we live?” Reporter replied: “We’re live.” Hernández: “The fact [is] we don’t give a f—.”
Billie Jean King on 50 years of the Women’s Sport Foundation: “When you’re reading history it goes really fast. But when you’re living it, it is really, really slow. It’s hard. There’s going to be a lot of patience and persistence and passion to do what you want to do. If you don’t have that, you’re not going to last.”
Team of the Week
Ruth Chepngetich. First woman to run a marathon in under two hours and 10 minutes. I know. Staggering, yes? Can someone run the stats, please? Is it that the longer the distance, the less – percentage wise – is the gap between the performances of elite men and women in athletics?
Italy. Beat Britain on Saturday to clinch the first Women’s America’s Cup. (Yes, me too. But good luck to them.)
Wallaroos. Won the Rugby WVX2 tournament with a win over Scotland
GWS Giants. Disgraced themselves on “Wacky Wednesday.” (See item.)
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