The first thing James Tamou did when he woke up on Sunday morning was take aside the eldest of his four boys for an awkward, but much-needed, chat.
Nine-year-old Brooklyn had been in the stands the previous night at the SCG when his father, the Wests Tigers skipper, snapped for maybe the first time in his playing career and was sent off.
“Brooklyn was the only one of my boys old enough to know what was going on, so I went to him on Sunday morning and asked, ‘Do you have any questions about last night?’” Tamou told The Sun-Herald.
“He said, ‘What did you get sent off for?’
“I said to him, ‘I swore at the referee, and that’s one thing you are never allowed do’.
“I actually said, ‘If you swear at the referee, you’re never allowed play football again’.
“I wanted to make sure the boys knew what I did was not OK. I pleaded guilty to the charge.
“Brooklyn nodded his head and took it all in. I could tell he was thinking about it.”
The 304-game veteran, who told referee Ben Cummins he was “f—ng incompetent” in the final moments of the embarrassing 72-6 loss to the Sydney Roosters, was only handed a one-match ban.
Tamou was facing two weeks – or what would have been the remainder of the season, and the end of his time at the Tigers – but successfully had his punishment reduced at Tuesday night’s judiciary.
Tamou bowed his head with embarrassment every time a different camera angle of him blowing up at Cummins was played at the judiciary.
James Tamou was sent off in the final minute against the Sydney RoostersCredit:NRL Photos
He spoke about how embarrassed he was for his children, as well as the under-9s he coaches in the local Penrith competition.
“I’m coaching kids, and how do I explain that behaviour to them?” Tamou said on the night. “How do they look up to someone like me when they see that on TV?”
The truth is, Tamou has been frustrated for a long time. He is angry the Tigers have struggled the whole two years he has been at the club. He was upset when coach Michael Maguire was sacked midway through the year.
He chose not to talk at all when the Tigers were robbed of victory against North Queensland last month, and only because he was worried about what he might say once he did open his mouth.
Humiliating defeats every weekend can wear down the best of men, especially ones who have tasted success at previous club Penrith and a premiership at North Queensland.
Which brings us to next Sunday and what is now looking like being Tamou’s last game for the Tigers when they host Canberra at Leichhardt Oval. The 33-year-old international does not know what next year holds.
There is the Super League, but who wants to move to the other side of the world when your four young children are now settled in school?
Then there is Redcliffe, but does coach Wayne Bennett really need another experienced forward?
The 72 hours between Saturday’s game and Tuesday’s hearing made Tamou suddenly realise he needed to get serious about his 2023 plans.
Plenty of Tigers fans will be wondering why the club has not made Tamou an offer, even a cheap one, and even if it is mainly helping mentor the young pack.
Those same supporters will be unaware it is Tamou who makes sure all the middle forwards meet for breakfast in Concord before every captain’s run, just to talk about football and life and any concerns they might have.
Tamou is open to playing on at the Tigers, but there have been no discussions. The Tigers are under the impression Tamou wants to move into coaching.
“Everything is on the table at the moment,” Tamou says. “I don’t mind if a team needs a cheap front-rower and I start out in the NSW Cup and work my way into the NRL side.
“If it means I have to prove myself to get into a team, I’ll play reggies. I’m glad I get to play next Sunday at Leichhardt. It would have been tough to get over had the Roosters game been my last game.
“Not once have I walked off the field and thought, ‘Right, I’m done, there’s nothing more I can give’. I don’t know if that’s me being stubborn, but I haven’t had those retirement thoughts yet.
“I know I have more to give. I want to prove to myself I’m not wrong in wanting to play on.”
Expect Tamou to be on his best behaviour next weekend. He learnt a valuable lesson. So did his four boys.
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